2008

I happily bid you adieu.

You fucker.

Cover Star: Kayla
Headlining Band: The Afghan Whigs

www.jamesmgraham.net

You Shouldn't Hide Behind Your Hair

"o, sometimes, i don't think I'll ever be
sure: coming back from who-knows-where
locked-up, downstairs. do you remember
what you were thinking of?

'well. maybe?'

call out to nothing in the wake of watching
her sip her wine from a camping cup on
some missing night. but, did just enough
ever give it up?

'when was i someone who you let inside
and held-on, too?'

(and somewhere)

a note just inside the door. is hoping
something is still where it was:

'i came to dance and
passed it up. once i
land, won't you come?
think of me: i just can't
move. i couldn't see
i never knew
i'd wonder where
i'll never be.'"

Three, count them, three more days until this hateful, hateful year is over...

Cover Star: Amy
Headlining Band: Richard Buckner

www.jamesmgraham.net

Brooklyn, New York, United States of America

home
sweet
home



Four, count them, four more days until this hateful, hateful year is over...

Cover Star: Cristi
Headlining Band: AMC

www.jamesmgraham.net

Light Holiday Reading

"I want to be in love with a woman
One who loved me
One who could show me I could trust her
One who could show me
That I didn't have to be on my guard all the time

I wish I could meet a woman that could show me something
One who could make my blood stop screaming."

- Henry Rollins, "Now Watch Him Die"

I Drove The Jag Today

oh boy

The Takeoff Makes No Sound...

I'm headed to NC tomorrow for the Holidays.

My Holiday hopes are not high and I'm packing my anti-anxiety shit with me. Something tells me it'll come in just fine and dandy handy. As long as the TSA permits me to walk on the flight with it.

A lot of my friends are hurting right now, financially, emotionally and literally, and my heart goes out to them.

As I've stated before, I'll be glad when this fucker (2008) is over.

I wish you all a more optimistic Holiday experience.

And I leave you with this very uplifting Christmas carol.

Dig it.

I'll be back soon...

Cover Star: Cristi
Headlining Band: AMC

www.jamesmgraham.net

And There's Blood On My Teeth

I print out little playing card sized versions of my photographs so that I can deal them out at the kitchen table or in a bar and take stock in them for my website, or my book or a gallery submission. It helps with sequencing, editing and overall comprehension of my body of work.

I spilled a Jack and Coke (!!!) on my little stack of printouts tonight, which have been sitting on my desk for six months now. As I "rescued" them with a wet paper towel and laid them all out to dry, I realized that I haven't looked at them as a whole for quite some time. There's probably fifty of them and they are drying out now, edges curled and fucked up slightly - and I like them. There's some good stuff in there.

I'm ready for this sordid year - 2008 - to be over, as are many of my friends, acquaintances and others. And seeing this booze and caramel soaked mess gives me hope.

As does this:



Cover Star: The Lower East Side, NYC, September 7th, 2008
Headlining Band: The Afghan Whigs, The Reading Festival, 1994, featuring Marcy Mays on vocals

www.jamesmgraham.net

I Just Called To Ask You What I Said Last Night

I'm an avid record collector.

I used to go to the big record convention in Hillsborough, NC with my buddies and buy all sorts of stuff on vinyl, most of which I still have.

But lately, for instance, combing through the treasures at the WFMU Record Fair here in Manhattan, I've been less inspired. I think for two reasons:

1 - I already have most of what it is that I've been searching for.
2- The shit is just becoming harder and harder to find - i.e. people like me are holding onto it.

Although there are some outstanding Suicide Commandos records that I want, but I ain't holding my breath for those (see #2).

Well, here's one that I want:



It's the only 45 by Naked Skinnies. According to Mark Eitzel, they had 500 pressed and he threw 250 away. I saw one on eBay once but it went for bank. Weird, since it's so obscure, but hey, I guess I just answered my own question.

So if anyone out there has one of the 250 that remain, send it to me and I'll send you a signed print - or some bank.

And in related news, I cannot for the life of me find my CD of AMC's "California," which is a MASTERPIECE and is idiotically OUT OF PRINT. I probably lent it to somebody...

Sigh...eBay and Amazon, here I come again.

FUCK! I gotta look around some more. It's got to be here somewhere...

I'm craving chicken wings from Bonnie's Grill. Park Slope but Buffalo style. And the best wings EVER.

Cover Star: "All My Life" b/w "This Is The Beautiful Night"
Headlining Band: AMC

www.jamesmgraham.net

Kept Dropping Spare Change

Dream Sequences from the past week:

- Playing pool to Jeff Buckley's version of "Hallelujah" - twice
- Bowling to The Smiths' "The Boy WIth The Thorn In His Side"
- Missing daylight entirely that one day
- That poor pomegranate
- The Lounge, mine in the kitchen and that one in "The Station Agent"
- Eggleston at The Whitney
- Flaming meat and margaritas at El Sombrero
- Walking, smoking, drinking, talking

And a bunch of other stuff I'd never mention here, but you know.

You know.

Cover Star: Danish Modern Nectar
Headlining Band: AMC

www.jamesmgraham.net

Finally...

Sometimes you just have to wait long enough for good things to happen. A good thing happened today. I finally got to shoot one-on-one with Mayan Lee.

Mayan is one of the first fetish models to take the Internets by storm. She's a legend. She's also cool as shit.

I accidentally shot her almost four years ago when I was shooting a model for my No Vacancy series in tandem with Melvin Moten, Jr., who was shooting Mayan in the same hotel room in Midtown. Towards the end of the shoot, we decided to do a "drunk showgirls" scenario with Laila and Mayan as the aforementioned showgirls in the stairwell.

I took four shots and knew I had it.

So, we've been going back and forth for this whole time since about doing a proper shoot.

This afternoon, it happened.

It was almost as much fun to hang out with her as it was to shoot her, and it was amazing to finally get her in front of my lens.

Thanks, Mayan. You ended my year just damn fine.

Evidence soon...

Oh, and two of my pieces are in The Dirty Show.

And it's my father's birthday. Happy birthday, Dad.

Cover Star: Mayan and Laila
Headlining Band: American Music Club

www.jamesmgraham.net

Bettie Page

RIP

You inspired us all.

"Bad Habits Make Our Decisions For Us...

...you should try and remember all you're holding is a hand full of dust."

I'm on a tear. Scanning negatives and listening to AMC.

Disclaimer, and my good friends can attest to this:

This shit could go on for quite some time, as when I latch on to something, I tend to drive it into the ground. I've done that with this band countless times. Hundreds, if you actually were to count.

I appreciate all the comments here, but "m," really, to start with "Mercury" would be a huge injustice. You have to grow with this band. Start with "Engine" then "United Kingdom" then "Everclear" THEN "Mercury" and finally "San Francisco."

And like I said, if you dig it that far, go back to "The Restless Stranger," their first album.



Double-date tonight with one of my favorite photographers and her husband, who I WILL ask for financial advice.

Uptown.
Bitches.

The rollercoaster ride continues. The last time I was on one (The Cyclone) I just kept screaming for them to stop it.

Just like I am now.

Slipping through Jesus' hands...



Cover Star: My Landlord's Worst Nightmare
Headlining Band: American Music Club (dedicated to a former friend of mine)

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone VIII

If you do not own any American Music Club albums, you are really missing out on some really profoundly brilliant and depressing shit.

One of my favorite bands of all time. Mark Eitzel was one of the best songwriters of the late '80's and early 90's.

We used to have the odd drink or two, and I got to know him a little bit.

Start with "Engine" and go through them all until "San Francisco." Then stop, unless...

...you really dig it. Then pick up their first album, "Restless Stranger" and his early solo stuff, like "50 Watt Silver Lining."

Do not ever listen to "West," which he recorded with Peter Buck from REM.

Trust me.

If you have any questions about anything in his catalogue, please, feel free to ask me. The one he did with the Greek guys where they covered a bunch of AMC songs is outstanding. And weird.

I have it all. Except for "West." OK, I probably have a copy laying around somewhere...

"Everything collapses here, in slow motion..."

I have two more shoots this year. I think.

And
That
Is
It.

Cover Star: Scar
Headlining Band: American Music Club

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone VII

My Grandmother's Sweet Potato Pie Recipe (makes two pies):

5 Sweet Potatoes (not Yams!)
1 Egg
2 Teaspoons Lemon Juice
2 Cups Sugar
1/2 Stick Butter (or Margarine)
1/2 Cup Milk

Wash potatoes, cutting away any imperfections.
Boil potatoes until soft, pour off water, and fill with cold water to cool.
Remove peeling by hand.
Place potatoes in large bowl.
Add butter (melted) and sugar.
Mash well.
Add egg, milk and lemon juice.
Mash again and stir well.

Pour into pie shells.
Bake 10 minutes at 450, then bake 45 minutes @ 350 degrees.



"Dirty boots are on - hi di ho..."

Cover Star: Anna
Headlining Band: Da Yout

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone VI

Today.
Woke up on the couch.
Shot Jenny.
Fell asleep on the floor.
Did happy hour with Kirsten.
Ate.
And listened to Magic Lantern on vinyl.

And wrote this.

Cover Star: Jenny
Headlining Band: Magic Lantern

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone V

"Always talking but never laughing
The trail it was laid out
Your patterns were made out
Closing all of your portal doors
Now I couldn't see your face
But my thoughts were full of grace
For you

I'm hoping that
You're knowing that
Anything from now
Is better anyhow

I'm knowing that
You're hoping that
Everything from now
Is better anyhow

Crawling back to a brand new old shoe
I always cross the line I'm always losing time
Give me less than and nothing happens
A taste is all it takes
And my bridge will surely break
Again

I'm hoping that
You're knowing that
Anything from now
Is better anyhow

I'm knowing that
You're hoping that
Everything from now
Is better anyhow"

Cover Star: Naama
Headlining Band: Varnaline

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone IV

It's cold here in Brooklyn. And windy, too. Bone chilling, in fact. But I've got left-over Kinara in the fridge and the cat has been fed her Tiki Cat tuna and chicken bullshit. And thrown it up.

This is me thinking out loud:

- Hey! Photo Editor Guy from PASTE Magazine...write me back!
- Should I submit three photos to The Dirty Show?
- And what about The Anna Kustara Gallery? Hunh? Hunh???

Enough.

"Bubblegum" is the perfect soundtrack to tonight's musings and meanderings. I've almost put every song from the record on this here blog, but here's one I haven't (OK, part of it once...)

I wish I had written "One Hundred Days."

(Note to self: Next life - musician. I'll drive all the sexy young thangs crazy, while hopping on one foot...they'll scream a lot at me).

I also wish I had shot this.

So, in the meantime, I gotta make me some photographs.
That matter.
To me.
This week.
The last three shoots of 2008.
Good riddance.

This photo was shot by Thom Salvatico in 2004 while I was shooting Sundae for my NO VACANCY series. She remains one of my favorite subjects ever. I have the privilege to shoot her again after the new year, five years later. Already 2009 is going to be better, even if the fucking world ends after Sundae and I shoot.



My shot:



Cover Star: Sundae St. Laurent
Headlining Band: The Mark Lanegan Band

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone III

When you talk to me about snow, I get all, uhmmm...

Cover Star: Darenzia
Headlining Band: The Mars Volta

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You Are Gone II

Arriving at your doorstep momentarily. With a tea kettle and a spatula. Or some such thing. Perhaps it's the cyclical nature of "time" - lose a ship and a ship sails into port. And on board, a puppet show with a live band, a paper bag, and a non-working "for display only" model of a rotary engine. Or some such thing. You know, just when you think everything changes, everything does, while you are thinking that everything changes. Then it changes again. It's not fair. That's what UPS is for. It's a scientific fact that if you move slowly enough you can pass through walls. And metal. And other people's lives. It all feels the same. But you have to move really, really slowly. Really fucking slowly. Practice that. You took that from your past. And still do. Remember when you talked about brushing your teeth and wondering what you'd look like when you were dead? Pristine and wonderful.

Wait!

A Em G. A Em G. A Em G. A Em G.

This is nonsense, you tell yourself and everyone else...
...but it sounds good. To you. Right now. And probably will tomorrow, too.

Cover Star: Reby
Headlining Band: Fugazi
Paintings: William Quigley

www.jamesmgraham.net

When You Are Gone, You are Gone

There's a silence, a vacuum, a void.
I gotta figure out how to fix that.

-----

Back in 1999, I was lucky enough to tour the original Ackermansion with Forrest J Ackerman on a warm Saturday morning in Los Angeles. Forry showed Toby and I the entire house filled to the brim with his collection of science fiction and horror props, memorabilia, letters, books and magazines. He told great stories, answered every stupid question in detail and invited us to go to lunch with him at The Sizzler. Dream fulfilled, it was one of the best days of my life.

RIP, Mr. Sci-Fi.


Cover Star: Persiana
Headlining Band: Foo Fighters

www.jamesmgraham.net

Abandoned Pomegranate

The second Brownie Hawkeye has been cleaned, hacked and repaired by my trusty assistant and I. Another is on the way, supposedly "pristine" but I doubt it. Those plastic lenses tend to oxidize and collect grease, even when only used by a little old lady to drive to church on Sundays.

The goal is to take the best elements of the three and create a "Frankenstein Brownie" - the most appealing organs, eyes, and body. Whether bad or good, I am still the brain behind this creature.

More soon.

I watched Jem Cohen's Fugazi documentary, "Instrument" (for the 20th time) last night with a friend. I am convinced that it is one of the few music documentaries that you can show someone who is not all that familiar with the band and it will compel them to love them. You can't say that about "Let It Be" or "We Jam Econo!" or even "Gimme Shelter."

You can, however, put "Instrument" in the company of "The Last Waltz," "The Kids Are Alright" and "The Daddy of Rock 'n' Roll." And "The Devil and Daniel Johnston."

More soon. When Fugazi gets off their asses and records/tours again...

I am available for a documentary too. Jus' sayin'. Wanna follow me around with a camera and see what it is exactly that I do?

Let's talk...seriously.

Sundance beckons...

Cover Star: Marzena
Headlining Band: Fugazi

www.jamesmgraham.net

I'm Really Glad There's a Grasp To Grab

Apple pancakes and pretty girls make for a great afternoon...

Cover Star: Sienna
Headlining Band: Built To Spill

www.jamesmgraham.net

The New World

WWJDD?

This is what he did.

He was on NBC right before the election (October 28th) and sang a song he wrote in 1984 that IS more poignant now than when he wrote it.

"Don't forget the Motor City..."

Well, I guess "we" did...good luck, guys.



John Doe makes everything better...

I got drunk with him one night at The Bottom Line (RIP) and it was glorious. The next time I saw him, shooting him in L.A., he said to me, "Hey man, the last time I saw you, you were high!"

So was he.

As my friend Tracy once said to me, "I want to marry John Doe."

I know I do. You do too.

And check out the pumpkin...and Billy Zoom.

Cover Star: X
Headlining Band: X

www.jamesmgraham.net

One Of The Two Bars We Know

And on a lighter note:

I just bought 127 film on eBay for this camera - 5 rolls.

Soon, an image you see here will be shot by this camera, the Kodak Brownie Reflex Synchro Model.

Which means that you will have to wait a while.

Like you fucking care.

Cover Star: The New Camera
Headlining Band: Swearing At Motorists

www.jamesmgraham.net

Identity

I saw Charlie Kaufman's "Synecdoche, New York" several weeks ago.

If you are familiar with his work, one of his favorite themes is "what is identity?" He began questioning it in the script for "Being John Malkovich" and continued exploring it in both "Adaptation" and "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind." But in his new film, he really spins the concept of "identity" inward upon itself until it basically produces a black hole. He even touches on "being defined by what one does creatively" as a cornerpiece of identity.

"Synecdoche, New York" is a very funny, extremely depressing masterpiece. Like all of Kaufman's scripts/films.

Lately, I've become acutely aware of some would-be photographers that seem to have no identity or "style" - which is fine as everyone has to begin somewhere and usually with a blank slate. But there is a fine line between being inspired by and ripping off. And both of those terms are relative as "everything" pretty much has been done - but not really. There are plenty of photographers that I admire that have amassed everything in the world, but spit it out as an unmistakable signature image. The stuff I'm talking about is an attempt at direct imitation - carbon copies. Notice that I wrote "an attempt" - that's the really sad part, since most of these would-be guys simply do not possess the ability to even recreate another's image faithfully. What I've been seeing looks like a Spinal Tap cover band playing on Bleecker Street for a $4.00 cover charge.

Think about that last sentence really, really hard. That's how good this stuff is...

Do I have a remedy? No, of course not. I just hate to see others passing off sub-standard copied work as their own "idea" - their own "identity" if you will.

I'm always flattered by imitation, but sometimes, when it goes to "eleven" it's just too fucking loud. Instead, think about the best cover songs you've ever heard - where the band makes the original song THEIR OWN.

These guys should all be spanked while listening to Chan Marshall.



Cover Star: Celia
Headlining Band: Cat Power

www.jamesmgraham.net

Safe Inside The Covers And Freezing

One year ago, things changed drastically. Black Friday. I think I had a doctor's appointment regarding my stomach, then I bought two pairs of shoes, neither of which I've ever worn. I saw the Richard Prince show at the Guggenheim. I wandered around in the photography section of The Strand, aimlessly. Lower Manhattan seemed empty and desolate and grey even though it was covered with the greedy throng of shoppers. Can't remember what I did that night, but it probably wasn't healthy. A mercy call to a good friend or two. Maybe I just ordered food and fell asleep in front of static, cat waking me up at 4am...

I was invisible.
A year ago.

Compare and contrast: New friends, new lovers, new acquaintances, a whole new body of work photographically. More heartbreak, some joy, some new music to fall in love with and the death of loved ones. Strengthening friendships to the point that there are some that I feel are amongst my best now that weren't then, necessarily.

Turmoil, exhilaration, pain and insight.
God, I hope there's been insight.

Better place now, for a number of reasons, but ultimately I made them happen, with help. Control from complete and utter chaos.

The big first step. And up the ladder I go...visible again. With a pretty good pool game to boot.

---

THE HAT project is almost complete. A little tweak left on one of the shots and it is money. I cannot thank THE HAT enough. These are tough times and sometimes one needs the intervention of THE HAT. Now if I could just get a job shooting SOME HATS each month...

So, if you are A HAT and you need photos, please contact me through my website.

That's all for now. Don't buy anything tomorrow, especially two dumb pairs of shoes...or a hat.

Cover Star: Bloody Light Switch
Headlining Band: Team Sleep

www.jamesmgraham.net

Paper Thin Walls

a⋅non⋅y⋅mous   
[uh-non-uh-muhs]
–adjective

1. Without any name acknowledged, as that of author, contributor, or the like: an anonymous letter to the editor; an anonymous donation.
2. Of unknown name; whose name is withheld: an anonymous author.
3. Lacking individuality, unique character, or distinction: an endless row of drab, anonymous house
4. Given the leeway the Internet offers one, not having enough balls to stand beside what you write

Tappy Hanksgiving.

Fucking Pilgrims...



Cover Star: Molly
Headlining Band: Mr. John "Sometimes feeling like shit is all you got." Doe

www.jamesmgraham.net

Everyone Moves Too Slow, Guaranteed

Spent the afternoon and evening with my dear friend Sita.
She wanted real NYC pizza. So I took her to Lombardi's.
We waited outside in the cold for half an hour before they let us in. Sunday afternoon, 5pm.

Worth it.

Then a walk though SoHo to the (closed) film lab and down to the wine store and then over to Toad Hall where we sat for hours and shared. And talked and laughed.

I pick friends really well.

Last night she had a "party" at The Slipper Room.
I was dressed to the 9's and was "on."

First time in a long time. Thanks, Stu.

Cover Star: Anna
Headlining Band: STT

www.jamesmgraham.net

The Hammer

Sometimes it has to come down.

Unfortunately.

Cover Star: Anna
Headlining Band: John Doe

www.jamesmgraham.net

Learn To Forget

Cover Star: Tia
Headlining Band: X

www.jamesmgraham.net

When It All Falls Away

He dragged himself out of bed and took a shower. Made some tea and tried to fully become - awake. It was Saturday, a day not unlike the past seven and not unlike the following infinity. He took his medicine, the stuff he takes when he is sick and fed the cat hers. Suited up in his black leather uniform, he ventured out onto the street, a place he feared like no other. Dodging the hoards of holiday shopping zombies, he ducked into the music store to pick up his guitar. Music store man was grumpy, but relinquished the newly set-up Danelctro, barn red and beautiful. On the way back home, people looked at him with that "you're a musician" look that people look at musicians with. He just stared straight ahead or at the sidewalk, since he really didn't like people or the way they looked at him very much. Not much went through his head anymore, just a wash of grey and white and black. Sometimes songs or melodies popped to mind, other people's, never his own, and he would hum a few notes and wonder where it came from. Where in the deep recesses of his memory were these useless things stored and what had triggered that song now. Like some celestial being dropping a quarter into a jukebox and selecting A67, John Doe's "Tragedy By Definition" one of the saddest songs ever recorded. He was not particularly sad and not that happy either. What was the diagnosis? Major depressive disorder, recurrent 296.31. Or something. Upon arriving home, he put the guitar case next to the garbage cans behind the gate and sat down on the stoop and lit a cigarette. It didn't taste good and made his stomach convulse ever so slightly. He was no musician. Hell, he was barely what you would call a smoker. He sat there for a good, long while and tried to think a productive thought. Looking down at his boots, he realized they were scuffed up a bit. Maybe he would go upstairs and shine them. Who was it, Bukowski, that said 'never trust a man with shiny shoes'? Maybe he would ask his neighbor to take a picture of him instead...

Cover Star: Not Bukowski
Headlining Band: John Doe

www.jamesmgraham.net

This is...

..the hottest thing I've ever seen.

OK, the hottest thing I've ever seen on the Internets...



Where do I get a jacket like that? And those pants? And that guitar? And that woman?

I want to shoot PJ more than anyone, except maybe Patti Smith...

Happy Friday!

Thursday Night In The Universe

Happy, for once...

...finally.

www.jamesmgraham.net

We Turn The Corner Safe And Sound...

Today, Al Qaeda deputy, Ayman al-Zawahri referred to Barack Obama as a "House Negro."

We're stronger than insults, I think...I hope. I really hope that we are. It's officially "on" even before it's officially started.

Sigh...
...the rest of our lives are going to be hard.
Not like what our Momma's told us.

Not.
At.
All.

But I prefer this world, my reality, to Eisenhower's.
It is now. For better or worse.
Scary as it may be. And it is...
...but it is ours.



Another "Hat" shot...just because I'm distracted, upset and bored.
ALL at the same time.
Time for some wine.

Good afternoon...

Cover Star: Cristi, stapled in the face and cut in half by my lab.
I miss the other half of her face. But I like what happened...
Headlining Band: The Silversun Pickups

www.jamesmgraham.net

Menacing Piece...

...of Space Junk.

Oh yeah...
...we went to the moon. No doubt about it...
...sheesh.

So, besides all that supposedly conspiracy shit ~

People really matter. Here's a person:



Cover Star: Cristi
Shot with a Hawkeye Brownie. On earth, 2008 with my fingers.
Not a Hasselblad on "the moon," circa 1969 with astronaut gloves on, mind you...

Headlining Band: Tom Fucking Verlaine

Bow down to Tom, bitches.
I do.

www.jamesmgraham.net

Questions, Questions, Questions...

...if you don't have questions...

...you are...

...dead.

Cover Star: Sibyl
Headlining Band: Shudder To Think

www.jamesmgraham.net

A Cinq Heures Cinquante-Cinq

Good afternoon...

Cover Star: Cristi
Headlining Band: Charlotte Gainsbourg

www.jamesmgraham.net

The Truth, It Wears Sharp Clothes

I was given a Kodak Brownie Hawkeye by my downstairs neighbor.

It was modified by camera genius Sanders.

I shot a roll. Color.

Focus is still a problem, as is the grime on the lens, etc...

But man, this is fun.

It just goes "click."

And I have to deal with it.

And once again, I am reminded that I just love taking photographs.

Cover Star: CRG
Headlining Band: Shudder To Think

www.jamesmgraham.net

Smoke Is A Ring But You'll Grow

I love the Fall. The season, I mean (ok, I like the band, too). Last night, to attend a Photo Editors conference at FIT, I pulled out the cashmere Calvin Klein long grey overcoat for the first time. I felt complete and warm.

After taking some friends (ok, insisting that we go) to Mustang Sally's (Hi, Rich!), I was all bundled up on the long ride home on the 2 train and feeling good. Really good. Which was noticeably odd, as I haven't felt that way since last November.
One year.

The leaves on the sidewalks of Park Slope are all yellow and crinkly. My mother would love to see them.

Her birthday is in two weeks as is my late Grandmother's. Thanksgiving.

The hat shoot has commenced and will continue over the next week.

And I was right: It didn't say a damn word as I was directing it last night...

...of course, it didn't sign a release either.

Cover Star: The Hat
Headlining Band: Shudder To Think

www.jamesmgraham.net

You Chew A Little Foil

Shopping at B&H tomorrow for portable flash accessories, and then I'm gonna shoot the fuck out of that hat. As I told my downstairs neighbor tonight (who was asking me if I might want to shoot a "model" apartment for her real estate business) the hat will not talk back. The hat will not blink. The hat will not say "I don't feel good" and the hat will not need to go to the bathroom.

The shot above is not of a hat. The shot above is of an agency model in Seattle back in May of 2007 that trusted me and wanted to do something a little different. The shot involved me and two "assistants" who took the fluorescent bulbs out of the stairwell lights in a hotel, ran electricity down the hall for my lighting and acted as lookouts. The shot took about two minutes. I love it. I keep hoping that she'll move to NYC and sign with an agency so that I can shoot her all the time. Although, I have access to a lot of talent here...

...but I fell in love with her a little bit. Professionally, of course.

Sunday night in the universe, music up loud, glass of wine and submitting photos to exhibitions across the country.

Making. Stuff. Happen.

Finally.

And no more Obama hating on my blog, ok? He's here for four years, motherfuckers. Let's make the best of it...

Cover Star: Stacee
Headlining Band: Shudder To Think

www.jamesmgraham.net

It's Not About Compromise...

It's a rare thing when you see a band on the same tour three times and they are phenomenal each time. A rare thing, indeed.

I saw The Gutter Twins tonight at The Warsaw in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. It was the next to last show of their year-long tour. I saw their very first live show ever, which was in Manhattan, and then about six months ago they came through and played Manhattan again.

The first show was sloppy, but great (there is a review of it somewhere on this mess I call a blog). Their second show was more tight and Greg and Mark traded vocal duties - sometimes even singing each others parts. And they started adding covers - Massive Attack's "Live With Me" and the traditional "St. James Infirmary" being the most outstanding.

Tonight it was more intimate. Two microphones, Greg and Mark side by side, and the band in the background, almost hard to see. They did plenty from "Saturnalia," several from their new covers EP "Adorata," three off of Mark's masterpiece, "Bubblegum," and a bunch of Twilight Singers stuff too.

But the gem of the evening was a cover of Dulli's former Afghan Whigs' "When We Two Parted" which brought the fucking house down.

That evil little fucking song holds a very special place in my black little heart.

Greg is 43 and Mark is 44.

Mark is just like me and sorta like Obama. And Greg is not far behind...

My favorite moment from the show tonight: When Dulli put on his sunglasses and asked "How do I look?" And everyone laughed really loud.

He could stand to lose about 30 pounds.
Jus' sayin'.

Cover Star: "Hurricane" Rebecca
Headlining Band: The Gutter Twins (a Jose Gonzalez cover)

www.jamesmgraham.net

Random Shit, Vol. XLIV

- The Roman numeral above is "44."

- Most of the evil in the world is caused by these people: Straight Old White Men.

- The Baby Kitty wants food now. It is a good three hours before her feeding time. Will someone explain that to her? Does Dr. Doolittle read this blog?

- My Father pulled "R" despite me egging him on to "make history." My parents live in North Carolina and my Mother always pulls "D" thereby canceling my Father's (and her) vote out. When I was last home, I asked him why they even bothered going to vote at all. He said something like it was his civic duty, or something. I shook my head. I sent him an email this morning saying that I hoped he pulled "D" like most of us did. He responded that of course he didn't, but that "the American people have spoken loud and clear with a 338 to 141 electoral count. I sincerely hope they are right. We shall see." I was proud of the old man...

- The hat is dark blue fuzzy suede and I've "secured" the model to shoot it on. Stay tuned.

- About Obama: I know that all politicians are corrupt. I know that anyone who wants to be President doesn't actually deserve the job. I know that campaign promises are all bullshit. I know I'll most likely end up yelling at him in March of 2009. But dig this: we elected a black man to be our Commander in Chief. That's bad ass. I never thought I'd live long enough to see those racial barriers knocked down with a vengeance. As an artist, I care about my right to freedom of expression. As a person, I care about every human being's right to decide what they do with their bodies. I care about the economy and unnecessary loss of life. I don't believe that anyone should ever kill anyone else, under any circumstances. I care about the United States of America. And I hope that Mr. Obama will do his best to further the things that I care about. As my Father said, "We shall see." In the meantime, I sure hope the guy doesn't get assassinated...that would set us back to pre-civil rights days.

- Apartment hunting is depressing. While none of us are making any more money (thanks Mr. Bush!) the NYC real estate market does not reflect that. What the fuck am I doing here? After seeing two shit-holes today for, respectively $1600 and $1800 a month, I may have just decided to stay where I am and suck it up. I have a beautiful place, I just need to make a little more money. Gallery show anyone? We shall see.

- I kicked ass at pool last night at Toad Hall.

- All the states that went for McCain should go away. I don't know exactly what that means, but I'm thinking about it and I'll get back to you...

- The Gutter Twins tomorrow night in Williamsburg. I'm going with a friend I haven't seen in years.

- It's quiet here.

Cover Star: Barack Obama (Stolen from the Internets)
Headlining Band: Smashing Pumpkins

www.jamesmgraham.net

"Todd, we ain't gonna be in the White House, baby."

Thank fucking god.

www.jamesmgraham.net

It Was Never My Intention To Stay So Long...

I was just given a photo assignment to shoot a hat.

And that's about all I know.

More details to come...

Cover Star:Kellie
Headlining Band: Lloyd Cole & The Commotions

www.jamesmgraham.net

We Can Reach Our Destination, But We're Still a Ways Away...

"Way to shield the hated heat."

I fucking hate Halloween.

Cover Star: Scar
Headlining Band: The Dream Syndicate

Laws Of Man Are Just Pretend

Halloween tomorrow
Used to be my favorite holiday
Fuck it

Election Tuesday
Panic attack
Berlin or Brooklyn?

History shows that "seven points ahead"
Don't mean shit
When shit can be bought
Or stolen

Halloween.
Is. Shit. Now.

Goblins are way more palatable than John McCain
And THAT chick

I'll take a Goblin any day
In fact I do
Surround myself with them

Cover Star: Jenise
Headlining Band: QOTSA

And She Said She'd Stick Around Until The Bandages Came Off

Last cigarette.

Last drink.

Rough Wednesday night...

Only Tom Waits makes sense right now.

Cover Star: Kendall
Headlining Band: Tom Waits

For Sarah

I was talking to a friend about you last night.

I miss you.

Cover Stars: Sarah and Tracy, Halloween 1994, at Kevin's loft on 2nd Street. Sarah went as Patti Smith.
Headlining Band: Giant Sand

When It Comes Apart, We're Gonna Have Some Fun, Son...

"Would you leave me alone
My sweet Simone
If I lay on my back
Down below on the track
Remember the night
How I’d wade in the water
Be counting the stars
And starting me over
They shine
Your eyes
Gonna make me rain,
Gonna make you rise
When I’m gone, Baby, don’t you forget it
I did all I did
Just to get through to heaven

Got no mother she can’t find me
Got no father he gonna blind me
Little girls might twitch at the way I itch
But when I burn it’s a son of a bitch

Hold on, hold on
Hold on, all misery gone
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, all misery gone

Make me, shake me, bleed all over
Going down to the ground
In deep black water
Let’s ride suicide
Say what you want, but you make it don’t lie
Don’t let me down, Baby, on a bed of hard thistle
Gonna die when I drown just to have it away
Those lies in my eyes
Push you down in the river till you testify

My mother, she don’t know me
And my father, he can’t own me
Little girls might twitch at the way I itch
But the way I burn is a son of a bitch

Make me, shake me, deep black water
Gonna run through my pain, gonna make it rain
Baby I’m gone, so don’t you forget it
I did all I did just to get through to heaven

Hold on, hold on
Hold on, all misery gone
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, all misery gone

If you could hear me love
I'd tell to you my story
To you and only you
So love that you might save me
I woke up from a dream
I woke up I was crying
I saw an animal
With eyes like mine on fire
I saw my own true love
She was a sullen flowers
Was she forget-me-nots
White lilies or red roses
And then from far away
Who's that I see come riding
Upon a pale white horse
Come riding fast as lightning

Oh, If you can hear me love
I'd tell you my story
So that you might save me."

Cover Star: Jessalyn
Headlining Band: The Gutter Twins

My Tornado At Rest

"I wanted to be sure to reach you;
though my ship was on the way it got caught
in some moorings. I am always tying up
and then deciding to depart. In storms and
at sunset, with the metallic coils of the tide
around my fathomless arms, I am unable
to understand the forms of my vanity
or I am hard alee with my Polish rudder
in my hand and the sun sinking. To
you I offer my hull and the tattered cordage
of my will. The terrible channels where
the wind drives me against the brown lips
of the reeds are not all behind me. Yet
I trust the sanity of my vessel; and
if it sinks, it may well be in answer
to the reasoning of the eternal voices,
the waves which have kept me from reaching you."

- "To The Harbormaster", Frank O'Hara

Cover Star: Kellie
Headlining Band: Concrete Blonde

Old Fashioneds

Had a little MAD MEN "party" last night with two friends to watch Episode 12 , since I don't have cable and we couldn't watch the season finale.

We made Old Fashioneds, after we wikipediaed (yes, that's a verb now) exactly how to make them (cherry and orange slice, thank you very much).

And when Mr. Draper ordered one, we toasted and took a drink too.

A little sweet for my taste, but fitting.

Season finale tomorrow night, just one cable-less day late...



Cover Star: Kellie
Headlining Band: Team Sleep

C-Spot

A couple of months ago, the editor for Columbia University's new "sex" magazine contacted me to shoot five dancers for the inaugural issue. No, not those kinds of dancers, an entire dance troupe from Columbia. Three girls and two guys.

She sent me two copies of the magazine this week. It's also on-line.

Apparently the press junket started this morning as I received an email from the NY Post and a phone call from Fox News.

I'm sure Fox will spin it as a bunch of privileged students - not studying to help the world, but fucking instead (and probably bring the fact that it's Obama's alma mater into it as well) - but it was kind of cool. I just told the Fox person to credit me...

Update: No photo, no credit. Just a bunch of rhetoric. Fox!



Despite that:

I woke up today feeling this way about everybody. And I mean EVERYBODY:

"Got a lot of questions for me
You got a lot of questions for me
Got your finger pointing at me
Distrusted
I look for wires when I'm talking to you
You'd make a great cop"

And my kitchen is still half yellow...

...and is it bad form to leave a half painted kitchen with a butt print on the wall when you wake up and realize that you have to move out of this place within the next 30 days?

FUCK!

I gotta go watch "Mad Men"...

Cover Star: Kellie
Headlining Band: Fugazi

Pleasant Evening

Spent with seven friends, old and new.

Most of the times, it doesn't get any better than that.

A comfort, of sorts.

Cover Star: Kitchen
Headlining Band: Jack Kerouac accompanied by Steve Allen