Nirvana

The making of a self-portrait is difficult.
At least for me.

Here's a shot of my hand and my latest victim, Candace. Wonderful, I know. This is what happens when I am blocking the shot. And I mean "blocking" theatrically, not like my hand is in the shot, yo.



Determining the shot is fine. Lighting it is a no-brainer. The model is always perfect (with direction).

So what's the difficulty?

Me.

I'm a self-conscious bitch. And that's all well and neutortic, BUT, this is a photographic series that needs some consistency. And I need to provide that.

How's my hair? Am I smirking? Where the fuck are my hands and what the fuck are they doing? Really, do I look like that?

As Pete Townshend famously said in 1982, "It's fucking hard."

All of my victims have been patient. The best ones found humour in my preening all queen-like. And laughed at me. I like that. Candace did.

But I'd like to think that it pays off. One way or the other...



Cover Star: Candace
Headlining Band: Duh (demo)

Just waiting for a royalties lawsuit from the RIAA...or Courtney's people to fax me...

www.jamesmgraham.net

I'm Feeling Very Sick And Ill Today

Cough. Cough. Cough.

Can't shake this thing that gripped me last Thursday.

The plague? Probably...

Makes it hard to smoke, ya know?

This is how mankind will go down, this is our future. Mark my typing...

My two photos from The Dirty Show arrived safely last week back from Detroit. Detroit! We love you! And we feel your economic deficit! Hang in there, Motor City! But buy some shit, yo!

The photo above is of Cristi wearing THE FURRY THING her mother donated for the shoot. Turned out that it turned out pretty damned cool. Way damned cool, in fact. Stacy helped. We love Stacy (see link to the right).

I feel like shit, but the last twelve days were the best I've had in a year and a half.

And that's nothing to cough at.

Cover Star: Cristi
Headlining Band: Da Smiphs

www.jamesmgraham.net

If You Just Let Me In...

Sometimes, everything is okay.

Even if you don't know it.

Sleep tight, my dear.

Cover Star: cd
Headlining Band: The Grifters

www.jamesmgraham.net

Enough Of Thinking Everything You've Done Is Good

A calm has descended, both internally and externally. The external, understandable and magical and beautiful, the internal, a mystery. Perhaps it's part and parcel of the external? Perhaps it's set and setting? Perhaps it's due to change - the country, my work, my medicine cabinet, my head and my heart?

Something's happening.

There is calm, for the first time in 14 months. And I wholeheartedly embrace it and all of it's messengers.

The battle, of course - and it's a delicate, delicate balance - is to not embrace too hard. Savor it, be appreciative and thank your lucky stars for every second. Don't try to own it, trap it, bottle it or wallow in it.

Just be. Calm.

Working on it...calmly.

I took this photo of Andrea Grant in November of 2007 at her apartment after she shot a commercial for Johnny Walker earlier in the day. She wore the dress in the commercial and kept it on for me. We had a cocktail, I set up my lights and she stood there. Time for the entire shot to be realized - 5 minutes. Confident and Calm.

Working on it, again...confidently.

When Rufus Wainwright wrote this song last year, it seemed to me to be a beautiful, barb-laden, anti-administration lament. It doesn't feel the same anymore due to change, but just listen - it's STILL brilliant. And reminds me that things were bad. REALLY bad. "Been burned down..."

Listen calmly.

Cover Star: Andrea
Headlining Band: Rufus Wainwright

www.jamesmgraham.net

Some Folks Inherit Star Spangled Eyes

And some don't. I didn't.

And I'm okay with that.



Cover Star: Katy
Headlining Band: CCR

www.jamesmgraham.net

I Swear It Wasn't Meant To Be

What I saw today:

I saw an Iron Queen have a near-meltdown, but crisis averted.
I saw a life-sized wookie, who said to me, "James, I gotta get out of this fucking suit!"
I saw some chick dressed in a white cape with a white bustier and white panties posing for photos.
I saw a bunch of fat, pimply guys with questionable facial hair.
I saw a bunch of astoundingly overvalued comic books.
I saw a Vampirella cover painting priced at $15,000.00.
I saw a whole lot of "Watchmen" shit...

Sometimes, I cannot believe the world we live in.
Sometimes, it makes perfect sense.

I'm glad to be home.

Cover Star: Katy
Headlining Band: The Sonic Youth

www.jamesmgraham.net

Fever Isn't Such A New Thing

The "Self-Portrait" series has been dusted off, resurrected and resuscitated. Renewed interest by an outside source FORCED me to shoot this last night.

I didn't want to do it.

Really I didn't.

Look for more. Or don't. I don't care.

And in uplifting news, Lux Interior from The Cramps is dead at 62 from an "existing heart condition." Fuck.

If you never saw the Cramps, you won't now. I did. Twice. And their "Tear It Up" in "Urghh, A Music War" was what grabbed me as a teenager...and made me frightened and fascinated.



RIP, Erick Lee Purkhiser.

It's Wednesday. In February. Two Thousand Nine?

Do I have an existing heart condition? My doctor says no...

Cover Star: Katy
Headlining Band: The Cramps

www.jamesmgraham.net